Samyukta's POV

It's been a week since I arrived here, and I haven't received any calls or texts from him, which is a relief. Plus, my brother arranged VoIP technology for my phone, enabling communication over the internet rather than through traditional networks. This makes it impossible for him to trace me.

Moreover, both of my families know that I won't be able to contact them often, nor will they be able to reach me easily since I'll be in camps in remote locations. Initially, they were worried about my safety, but I managed to convince them that the organization would take special care of us. I even hinted to my father-in-law that  Samrat bhai sa, has set up a security system for me. He was relieved and assured the family that I'll be safe.

The purpose of this exchange program was to create distance from him. I've made the decision to remove myself from his life entirely. This program is providing the much-needed time and space for me to move on.

It's painfully evident that he harbors jealousy towards his own family and holds a significant level of distrust towards me. He seems to believe that I have no genuine feelings for him and that I only married him for the sake of his family. How could he think such a thing? Doesn't he understand the importance of our relationship in my life? Is marriage something I would enter into lightly, solely because I admire his family? What if he doesn't reflect the qualities of his family that drew me to them? Would I truly be happy?

Unfortunately, I did fall into this trap of assuming that he would mirror the traits of his family. It was foolish of me to make such assumptions. I am solely responsible for the ruin of my own life and relationships. I deeply regret agreeing to marry him, regardless of any budding feelings I may have had at the time.

Marrying you is the biggest regret of my life, Abhimanyu Singh Rathore.

"So, all set for Istanbul?" Sakshi ma'am asked, appearing behind me.

Quickly wiping away the tears that had gathered around my eyes, I nodded and offered her a faint smile.

Currently, we were in the lounge of the Gynecology department at King's College. Ever since arrival, we've been undergoing training for the upcoming campaign in Istanbul. We'll be departing for there next week.

"Are you fine, Samyukta?" Sakshi ma'am asked, lightly gripping my right shoulder.

"Yes. Why?" I responded, a bit startled that she could sense my emotions despite my efforts to hide them.

"You've become so quiet. Last time I saw you was at your wedding, and you were all smiles, happy, and cheerful. These days, you seem as if all the colors have drained from your face. Is something wrong? Are your in-laws treating you well?" she inquired, her concern evident in her voice.

"My in-laws are some of the best people I've known," I chirped immediately, attempting to mask any hint of distress.

"And your husband?" her question pierced through me, plunging my heart deeper into despair.

"He's nice too," I murmured, my voice barely audible.

"Samyukta, if you don't want to say anything, it's fine. But you know you can tell me whatever you're feeling, and I'll be all ears anytime. Plus, this sudden exchange program—when I asked you to come over six months ago, you said you wanted to focus on your newlywed life right now and would come later. But suddenly you're here. All this..." she trailed off, her concern evident in her eyes.

"I'm fine, trust me! I really wanted to take up this program to improve my profile. Plus, everyone encouraged me. So here I am," I replied, attempting to reassure her.

"Good to know that. Now I won't be worried then," Sakshi ma'am chuckled, and I nodded weakly, forcing a faint smile.

I could put on a facade, but inside, I felt overwhelmed. Everyone around me was so caring and understanding, except the person I wished would be the most understanding of all.

It was Sakshi ma'am who helped me settle down in London. Despite both the Chauhans and the Rathores having their villas here, I chose to opt for student accommodation.

I wanted to be away from anything that would remind me of him, yet he lingered in my mind constantly, no matter how much I tried to push him away.

As the clock struck five in the evening in London, us camp trainees were done for the day. I started walking towards my university residence. 

Author's POV

As Samyukta walked through the streets of London, the changing weather seemed to mirror the fluctuations of her emotions. The coolness of the air brushed against her skin, offering a sense of refreshment that contrasted with the heaviness weighing on her heart. The gentle breeze whispered secrets of the city, carrying with it both a sense of possibility and a reminder of the distance between her and her past.

As she walked through the bustling streets of London, her eyes caught sight of a couple locked in a tender embrace, sharing a passionate kiss. Nearby, another pair laughed and hugged, their joy infectious in the crisp evening air. The scene unfolded before her like a cruel reminder of the love and happiness she felt so far removed from.

Overwhelmed by a sudden wave of emotions, she felt her heart constrict painfully in her chest. With each passing moment, the weight of her loneliness seemed to grow heavier, suffocating her with its intensity. Unable to bear the sight of such unabashed affection, she hurried back to her dormitory, seeking solace in the sanctuary of her own space.

Once inside, she bolted the door behind her, desperate to shut out the world and the raw ache gnawing at her soul. Alone in the dimly lit room, she crumpled to the floor, her body wracked with silent sobs as tears streamed down her cheeks unchecked. The floodgates of her emotions had burst open, and there was no stopping the torrent of grief and longing that consumed her.

Samyukta's anguish overflowed, and she found herself sinking to her knees, her hands clasped tightly in supplication. With tears streaming down her face, she cried out to the heavens, her voice a desperate plea echoing in the silent room.

"Why, God? Why me?" she whispered, her words choked with emotion. "I miss him so much, but he doesn't care. Why must I endure this pain? Why must my heart ache with every beat?"

Her voice cracked with the weight of her sorrow, each word punctuated by a deep-seated longing that seemed to consume her from within. In the depths of her despair, she struggled to make sense of the cruel twist of fate that had torn her love apart, leaving her adrift in a sea of loneliness and longing.

"God, in just six months, how has so much happened that I feel so deeply attached to him?" she murmured, her words a plaintive cry of confusion and longing. "Why can't I let go? Why does his memory haunt me like this?"

Clutching her mangalsutra tightly in her hand, Samyukta felt the weight of its significance pressing against her chest. It was a symbol of the vows she had exchanged, a tangible reminder of the love she had once shared with him. But even as she held it close, she couldn't help but wonder why she couldn't bring herself to remove it from her neck, to sever the ties that bound her to him.

Her gaze drifted to the ring he had given her, a simple band of gold with a diamond stud that now felt like a heavy burden upon her finger. In that moment, she felt a surge of doubt and uncertainty wash over her. 

Was she deceiving herself? Was she clinging to a love that no longer existed, unable to accept the reality of her situation?

The realization hit her with a force that took her breath away. Despite her best efforts to move on, to bury her feelings deep within her heart, she couldn't deny the truth any longer. He had become a part of her, woven into the very fabric of her being, and try as she might, she couldn't shake the hold he had over her.

In that moment of clarity, she faced a painful realization: no matter how hard she tried to convince herself otherwise, he had become irrevocably important to her. And with that knowledge came the understanding that moving on would be far more difficult than she had ever imagined.

As she sat amidst her tears and turmoil, a flicker of determination sparked within her weary heart. With a deep breath, she made a silent vow to herself: she would focus on the present, on the tasks at hand, and deal with the complexities of her emotions later.

"Istanbul... six months away," she whispered to herself, the words a mantra to calm her racing thoughts. "For now, I need to gather my strength and focus on the journey ahead. There will be time to confront my feelings later, when I am ready."

As Samyukta wiped away her tears and summoned the strength to face the tasks ahead, she made her way to her suitcase, determined to pack for her journey to Istanbul. With each item she folded and placed carefully into her bag, she felt a sense of purpose wash over her, a renewed resolve to embrace the challenges that lay ahead.

Just as she zipped up her suitcase, her phone suddenly rang, breaking the stillness of the room. With a quickened pulse, she glanced at the screen and saw an unknown number flashing across it. 

˜”*°•°*”˜